HO HO HO! We hope each and every one of you fiends had a great Christmas.
To polish off the holidays in a merry fashion, we decided to do a Bonus Episode on a Bad Movie Sunday recommendation, the 1989 flick, Elves.
Kirsten hates Christmas. So much so, that her and her friends, who’ve dubbed themselves “The Sisters of Anti-Christmas” perform a ritual to ruin Christmas. But unbeknownst to them, they actually performed a Nazi spell, calling forth an elf who is on a mission to impregnate a woman in an attempt to create a super-race of people who will take over the world. Makes sense right?
Listen up as we discuss the weird incestuous vibes this movie puts out, Grizzly Adam’s upsetting lack of Santa attire, and the truly insane last words of our “final” girl. Enjoy!
Also, episode 100 is just around the corner, so please feel free to reach out to us with thoughts of what we should watch watch, or give us fun stuff to read on the air!
It was Erik’s turn to pick the flick this week, and he graced us with the 1986 teen karate movie, No Retreat, No Surrender- which (barely) stars Jean-Claude Van Damme in his second credited role. Bad Movie Sunday (@BadMovieSunday1) recommended this to us a while ago, and we are sooo glad we finally got around to it…
When the mob tries to strong-arm Tom into selling his dojo- which they plan to use as a front for their criminal activity- Tom resists and is badly beaten. He quickly decides to close the business, and relocates his family from sunny Los Angeles, all the way to Seattle. Injured and defeated, Tom swears off fighting for good. However, it’s not quite as easy for his son, Jason. Jason makes an enemy on their first day in the new neighborhood, which in turn ignites a rivalry between himself and the local dojo. With nowhere to turn, Jason prays to his idol, Bruce Lee for guidance… After which, the ghost of Bruce Lee promptly appears before him, ready to teach all of his martial arts secrets. CUE DOPE TRAINING MONTAGE!
Will Jason be able to harness the power he needs to get the girl, win over the dojo, and get revenge for his father by defeating the deadly Ivan Kraschinsky? Only one way to find out!
We spend a little time comparing this movie to the likes of Sidekicks, Breathing Fire, etc. We also discuss the sweet martial arts in this movie, how this was originally meant to be a porno flick, and why Jason’s dad is such a little bitch. Listen up!
Our flick this week was a recommendation from our friends over at Bad Movie Sunday (which Bristol Bad Film Club was kind enough to give us access to), and we cannot thank them enough for it. We were joined by our friend (and first-time guest), Gray, as we viewed and discussed the masterpiece that is Road to Revenge (1993) aka GETEVEN aka Karate Cowboy aka Satanic Panic. Just kidding about those last two… Or are we?
Road to Revenge follows disgraced former police officer (and current limo driver), Rick Bode, as he attempts to take down a Satanic cult- which happens to be headed by his former partner, Normad. Aided by his girlfriend, Cindy (a former cult member), his perpetually drunk best friend, Huck, and a Native American mannequin, Rick sets off to get even.
Armed with nothing more than some leather pants and a song, John De Hart mystifyingly manages to make this vanity project completely entertaining (and bizarrely endearing).
Listen up as we discuss the Shimmy Slide, black-belt poodles, and uncomfortable sex scenes involving ice cubes!
This week on Second Class Cinema we watched a film recommended to us by the fine folks over at Bad Movie Sunday! We had the pleasure(?) of viewing 1982’s “superhero”/mercenary oddity, Megaforce.
When the peaceful country of Sardun finds itself at odds with their neighboring country of Gamibia, they have no way to defend themselves from an impending invasion- or even war. Enter Megaforce: a secret mercenary company comprised of soldiers from all over the world, headed by Commander Ace Hunter (a flamboyant, gold-spandex-clad Barry Bostwick). Sardun sends one of their military leaders, Major Zara, to request Megaforce’s assistance in crushing their opponent, Gamibia- which just happens to be led by Hunter’s old military pal, Duke Gurerra.
The stakes are… Surprisingly low… as Megaforce uses holographs, spandex, and flying motorcycles to bring Gamibia to heel.
We had some fun watching this one, although, it was difficult to figure out who the target audience for this film was. Listen up as we discuss awesome pyrotechnics, awesomely bad rear-projection scenes, and a grotesquely sappy thumb-kiss that no one should ever be subjected to. Ever.
Thanks to our pals at Bad Movie Sunday for recommending this flick.